You're not getting better with girls? Here's why.
Updated: Oct 13
I remember when I was 23. I had been aware of the concept of "success with women" since I was 15. But still, there I was, paralyzed at the idea of approaching a cute stranger on the street. I had read all the internet theory, knew all the right psychological trick to apply to every situation, and yet.. When meeting women face to face I was still scared shitless. (And chances are that you are part of the 90% of men who feel the same way.)
Example of what happens when overconfidence meets real life
I had so much confidence in my "dating skills" and yet so little results to back that up, I was so delusional and proud. Now that I think about it I think this had it's charm in its own twisted way. I still had no idea what to say and my brain would freeze every time, especially talking with a very hot woman. I'd end up trying too hard to be cool or funny and she'd lose all interest quite quick. And with girls who liked me I'd, of course, always hesitate to make a move when they wanted it.
I was not totally desperate, I had some success with online dating and friends of friends though. But can you really call that "success"? And that's the state of average mediocrity that most men spend their life in.
Now I'm sure that when you first discovered this whole success-with-women-thing you were imagining yourself juggling with girls, even having them chase you just for the fun of it. Where has that gone now?
There is a world in which you become that man. But not the world in which you keep not taking action, watching "how to-s" online, protecting your ego from the outside world and caring about other's perception of you.
You really really do not want to be a keyboard jockey. All the knowledge in the world is useless compared to the real world experience of those who are already diving deep in the mix. Getting their ego hurt but their dick sucked on a daily basis.
Do you know Chad? The guy who is popular because he plays sport and has a loud mouth, who knows nothing about pickup and seduction but gets on with the prettiest girls? Yeah you might say that it's because of looks. But if that's what comes to your mind as the first obvious answer to everything that is seduction related, this post ain't for you fam.
(Shoutout to my local Telegram wings group where that one guy is photoshopping all his Tinder pictures, basically catfishing girls, because he's too lazy to learn proper text game and basic photography. Don't be that guy.)
You might also wanna think about Joe. Joe is the weed bro that supplies the campus. Joe doesn't give a shit about nothing and he's honestly quite fun to be around. He's quite skinny and also a bit of an asshole. Sometimes he hurts people's feelings. Still, girls love him.
Again, you might say that's because he has the drugs and girls like assholes. Or could it be that, just like Chad, he isn't complaining about his loneliness on the internet?
Gotta be honest, I've seen ugly ass warehouse workers get sexy and submissive girlfriends just because they know how to behave as a man rather than a boy. Because they had real-life experience in social dynamics and were not afraid to get their ego hurt often.
If I write this right now it's as a reminder that nothing good comes fast nor easy, and that the path is narrow and sinuous, but the reward does still wait at the end. Go out. Don't be a keyboard jockey. Keep hustling!
PS. I also launched the Facebook group in which I post daily actionable dating and lifestyle mindsets to make you a top 1% man, you can join up in here.
Goal is to share value with others hustling. And I hate spam so it's closely moderated.
PSS. A few days ago I posted the 4 steps text-to-date system, it's an info graphic that I made myself and I'm sooo excited about you guys seeing it and getting value from it that I'm pushing for it again, join the Facebook group!